1. I would not allow this employee to breed.
2. Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started
to dig.
3. Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a
trap.
4. When she opens her mouth, it is only to change whichever foot was
previously in there.
5. He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.
6. This young lady has serious delusions of adequacy.
7. He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
8. This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
9. This employee should go far - and the sooner he starts, the better.
10. Got deep into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.
11. A room temperature IQ.
12. Got a full six-pack, but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.
13. A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.
14. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.
15. He's so dense, light bends around him.
16. If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.
17. If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change.
18. If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.
19. If brains were taxed, he'd get a rebate.
20. Takes him an hour-and-a-half to watch Sixty Minutes.
21. Donated his brain to science before he was through with it.
22. Bright as Alaska in December.
23. This associate is really not so much of a has-been; more of a definitely
won't be.
24. It's hard to believe he beat out one million other sperm.
25. The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead.
DPetty 
